✨Side of the Road✨

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Waiting by the side of the road

Watching the world pass ahead 

In search of an adventure to come

In search of stories I've read.

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Have a thirst that goes beyond

Skin-deep love we've come to know. 

I've been called idealistic 

More times than I care to show.

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But I chose to keep the fire alive 

For I've felt deep love on the side of the road. 

It's in the waiting, that all is revealed

The love and adventures which lie in our souls.

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In the waiting, is where we see

That there is no need for us to wait 

The whole world is within us

The path, itself, is our fate.

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No need for a destination

For the one with a lightened heart

No false expectations made

When you're content where you are.

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So come, sit down and share with me 

This still view of cars to pass

We can wait together, side by side

For as long as the waiting lasts.

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Let's fall in love with this moment

Let the love selflessly explode 

Because the universe, believe it or not,

Lies right here, by the side of the road 💛

A Little Bit of Love

I want love to be the filter through which I see everything. I want love to be the path I walk on.  I want love to be the after-taste of this life. Life, a cuisine so intricately delicious, but only when it is sprinkled with love as its main spice, for without it, there is no taste.

          This is an understanding I have gotten to only very recently because, before now, I struggled with what love truly meant to me. Sometimes, I still struggle with it. The meanings or associations typically given to love, at least from what I see, are never the associations that I could relate to. Look at Valentine's Day, for instance. A day dedicated to love, and all people can think about is whether they will receive chocolates and flowers *insert deep eye roll* Also, it's suppose to be a whole day dedicated to all things love, yet most people seem to boil it down to only romantic relationships when there are so many other things in this world, and so many people to love. I judge the day, not for its desired sentiment, but because I think it makes a mockery of what love is. Most people recognize that it's just a hallmark holiday, even the ones that celebrate it, but do they recognize how much the day, itself, shows us that love has come to be understood as some kind of transaction, something to be given only when something else is received in return?

          To view love as a transaction is to poison its very essence. There is strength in the ability to give love to the world and expect nothing in return. There's a part of you that disagrees, and I know this, because that part exists in me too. However, I have come to learn that that part of us, which disagrees, is the part that is fragile, is the part that's afraid to get hurt, afraid to be taken advantage of, and, therefore, it cannot be the part of us that possesses strength, although it very much tries to convey otherwise. Real strength comes from the ability to accept the flow of life and the flow of people, with all of their ups and downs and unpredictability, and to love them anyway. I believe that love, in its truest form, has no opposite. It's this type of love that I wish to feel, not only for a person, but for all people, for moments, for life. I wish to feel the type of love that connects me with everything and everyone. I may sound like a naive dreamer who is living up in the clouds, but I've had momentary experiences when I've had a taste of it. I know it's there, and I know it's possible, and I know that it's the best feeling that anyone can ever have because it feels like home.

       

Anxiety, My Lover

Anxiety comes to me in shortness of breath, as I find myself gasping for air [that is polluted with lost dreams and hopes.]

He comes to me with a sudden rapid beating in my chest, and for a moment I lose myself [as I feel the walls caving in on my heart, squeezing it for every last bit of light it has left.]

He, the lover that has been with me for so long. 

He, who has gazed into my tired eyes and [selfishly] said “I will always be there.” 

He, who has caused my fingers to shake.

He, who has taught me the meaning of peace [only in his absence.]

He turns my excited butterflies into blind bats slamming against walls because they need to escape. 

And I invite him back every time because I can’t let go. I’m anxious without my lover, Anxiety. Who am I without him? 

He who comes to me when I’m at my loneliest, but at least he comes to me. 

By: Banafshé Eshragi

A Dance With Nothing

The freedom to be nothing

To be with Nothing?

Print by Nilou Afshar
www.nilouafshar.com

We make eye contact

In an empty room
Back and forth and back

Nothing and I share this dance

And in this moment
I have Nothing, and Nothing has me

Nothing holds me as we move

Back and forth, on and on

Intoxicated by the beat of the drum

Oh what a lover Nothing is to me

For it knows our love is temporary

And yet, it also knows that one day I will return

For nothing burns the way Nothing burns

Holding me, scolding me

Tossing and turning me

Nothing, a silent lover 

Who gives me a chance

And we, together and alone

Share this dance

I Can Feel You

I can feel you in the wind

You're the tear drop that drops down my chin

You're the sweet flower that blooms in the spring

I am bound to you by the joy you bring

You're every rain drop that drops on my head

Burried in my heart to the very end

For you are the colour in my life

You're the sharpness of a knife

You're the sweet touch that touches my soul

And you are the love I'll never let go

Cigarette Lingers

I wrote this poem many years ago, but it's one of my favourites.


The smell of cigarettes and sex lingers

In my head, bed sheets, sweat

Instantly I regret

Not saying what I should have said

But there was no need to speak

The room wreaked

Of unspoken words

Scars and hurts

And who did it first

Who entered who?

I entered you

Yes through your head and sweat

The stench of silence,

You cant forget

You entered me physically mentally

Fast but gently

you pushed and pulled

Too hot, too cold

All but a memory now

Yet I feel it somehow

The smell of cigarettes and sex lingers

Your sweat was on me

Clinging stinging seeping through my skin

Deeper and deeper in

So loud,

Profound

In the moment

Handed you my life to be left open

Serenaded by your kiss on my chest

Emptiness, you took the rest

And yet the cigarette lingers...

Choose or Lose

In the depths of my soul

I know I can't let go

Of the past that was

Because

I'm so wrapped up

And tangled up

You must know

How I feel

The need to peel

Away the weight

Of memories

That come too late

In the night

In the core of my being

I look but I'm not seeing

That I've trapped myself

In the deepest hell

I was told to let go

But I cling on

To nothing

Slowly rotting

And I'm growing restless

Can but then can't help this

Feeling of loss

But I must

Take it slow

I know you know

How hard it can be

You're the one who told me

To make a choice

That I have to chose

Or else I lose

Everything that's in the depths of my soul

I know the time's come for me to let go.

White Rabbit

White little rabbit

Always so curious

To the world that surrounds you

Running after time

Running after hope

Big questions that astound you

Running from the hunter

Running from the danger

Too bad it already found you

Too busy always running

Searching, sniffing for some clues

Can't see what is around you

So little rabbit run

The world is after you

But you're still waiting for the sun

You gotta run rabbit run

Stop waiting for the unknown

There's no safety from anyone

A small fragile creature

So delicate the body

Still looking for that road

Too brave and brittle

Not ready to leave it behind

You're carrying a big load

Tired from running

Suffering and pain

Life's taken it's tole

Just want to enjoy the sun

Sit down and surrender

Digging up your own hole

But please run rabbit run

The world is after you

Waiting for the rising of the sun

Little rabbit run

Too much pain in the past

But another day has just begun

So Rabbit run. 

Tangled Thoughts in an Empty Room

Print by Nilou Afshar
www.nilouafshar.com

Though it's empty

The room is heavy

It's filled with nostalgia

And a memory

That can't be traced

Too much empty space

That once was full

Of movement and life

And now it's stale

Cut the silence with a knife

A silence so thick, so tangled

With aimless thoughts

Memories I forgot

Words, unsaid

Broken promises that bled

But within these walls, they remain

For the room is meant to contain

The burden that has been burnin slow

The burden that I shake off

As I turn off the lights 

And go

Our Breaths Dance, But We Do Not

Worlds of colours
Mixing with one another
Wind breezes on through
Creating swirls that travel
Between Me and You

Our breaths, warm
As we exhale and
Together they float
And they dance
Before our eyes
How beautiful
It is to witness this ritual
Which is communicating
More than words ever will
Communicating the sensuality
Of something we can't sense
For it is our breaths
That continue to dance
As we slowly turn away.

The Crows Caw

The crows warn me

Of what's to come

Trees covering the sky

Hovering over my

Head and I

Can't shake off

The feeling of

Breathless breaths

Countless deaths

Of dreams it seems

I walk this path

Of leaves

The moonlight

Sneaking through

The cracks of branches

Showing the darkness

To me, with patches

Of light

I might

Have a chance 

I think to myself, but then

The crows tell me so

And I know 

That I walk blindly

But light of the moon 

Will guide me

Hitting my face

So gently

On this path 

Of my future and past

Made from dried out leaves

And long lost dreams

I proceed

Leaves crunching

Beneath my feet

The crows caw 

Their notes, raw

And so I face my own defeat

The Road Will Be Mine

For those of you who like poetry, here is another:

Sitting in the passenger's seat

Waiting for something to happen

When I realize that I'm holding the wheel

But I can't move because I'm strapped in

The feeling of panic sets in

The car moves faster and I can't control it

I want to stop but I'm trapped in

With my hands numb I can't hold it

I realize that this is the moment

Either give in or give it all up

“But I'm not ready yet” I told it

“So you must tell the panic to stop”

Stop! I take control because I know

How this will eventually end

Be it smooth, rocky, fast or slow

The road will be mine to bend

Its bumps, mine to mend

Its wisdom, my friend

The road will be mine in the end

Bells Hit the Ground

Because a little poetry never hurt anyone, here is something I wrote a while ago.

Gentle rain

Penetrates

The pores

It pours

Down

It goes

Collision

Of drops 

With the ground

They sound

Like bells

Or like a

Piano sounds

The skin

Surrounded

By Fog 

I long

For it 

To touch me

The trees

Whisper 

No path 

In front

No path 

Behind

But the rain

Will guide

When the fog

Blinds

In my breath

I trust

I must 

Keep going

I am alone

But I long

To be

The whisper

Of a tree

The music 

Of rain

The smell 

Of grass

I long 

To be

One with the living

One with the dead

I know 

I must

Trust in my breath